Dealing with Setbacks

Every few months I find myself asking the same questions…
 
-What if I had stuck with my plan?
-What if I hadn’t let myself get out of that routine?
-What if I had kept working on my nutrition program like I had a few years back?
-How do I keep myself honest and up front with my goals, setbacks, progress and where I am trying to go?
 
All of these and variations of these questions have been at the back of my mind for the last couple of weeks. Since starting Stella Fitness, I find myself looking at my life and trying to see where I can improve. Where I can grow and what I can do to pick myself up from where I currently find myself. Combined with that – I think there is a common perception about the health and fitness community itself that us trainers live and breathe for exercise. We are critical of how we look – sometimes at the expense of our physiological demands. The thing is, I’ve a hard time with my own health and fitness. There’s this misconception about personal trainers and how we eat perfect, sleep the perfect amount and live to train. This perception that we’re infallible and can’t do anything wrong because we’re physical specimens.
 
BS….

It’s so easy to sit on the couch and watch TV.

It takes so much less effort to go out to eat than it is to cook that healthy meal at home.

Counting Calories? It sucks.

Each and every one of these questions run through our minds. Personally, I love eating boatloads of crappy foods every now and then. I just took to logging my food only to find out that I am pretty much depriving myself of nutrients throughout the week – until the weekend comes along and I crush it. Not a cheat day – a cheat weekend is more like it. And every time I stuff my face with bread or sweets, I always get down on myself or try to ‘make up for it’ with a kickass workout. Truth is, you can’t make up for it. You can only learn from it.

So I take a look back at myself. I run through all the pictures of me sporting a 6-pack. Veins ripping up my ‘tight core’, shoulders that look like they were carved from marble, a shoulder-waist-hip ratio that I’d kill for today.

Then I think about it.

I’ve done it before. I can do that again if I want.

It’s not something that my genetics is limiting.

There’s so much stress on the physical self in this career. And it can really be intimidating – but that’s why I love it. That moment you are able to crush that intimidation with a compassionate kick in the ass…worth every second. A lot of people fail to say ‘I am proud of myself’. And that’s where a true professional comes in.

Realizing that you don’t need to be perfect. That your greatest desire is to learn and grow. To push your limits further than you have before. You’re going to lay a perfect brick each and every time you strive to put up a wall. You want to live with action and passion. You want to learn through action. You want people to love you for who you are and what you do. And even though your friends, family, clients and all those faces behind Social media will judge you when you take off your shirt, that’s ok. You are who you are and you are proud.

This weekend was full of reflection. One of my closest ‘clients’ recently came to me, tail between the legs after putting on some weight after dropping a significant portion. The thing that hit home to me in our discussion was how easy it is to beat yourself up. There isn’t a day that goes by where you tell yourself to put that food down. There isn’t a moment where you try to trick yourself into thinking a donut is healthy for your body. When we were talking, there was disappointment, frustration and regret in his voice. In my mind, the only thing that mattered was that he had done it before. There was hope and he needed to realize it. And this time it’s going to be done the right way.

There was a moment when we spoke that told me he was ready for change…nothing more than a quick quip.

After we spilled our frustrations, regrets and self-hate, we defined what our outcome was going to be. We know where we are going and what kind of dedication it will take. We talked and decided on a program. We’re not going to be perfect. We’ll never be. After he received the program, all that was said in the moment was the following:

Ok, I’m in.

A tone of finality. A tone of focus. A deliberate case of affirmation.

He had forgiven himself for the relapse and is ready to attack it again. And there was something more to it than just a moment of readiness. There was something in it that inspired me. I knew he was ready to do it again. And this time, he seems hungry. He’s ready for the battle.

There are moments of weakness. There are moments of clarity. And when those two moments meet, you’ll feel vulnerable. When you realize the change you want to see, you have all the power in the world and there’s no stopping you.

It’s not going to be easy. It takes dedication. And bravery like you’ve never known before. But know that for every moment you struggle and fret and want to quit, there is someone out there cheering you on, working hard FOR YOU because YOU motivate them.

To all my clients, fellow trainers and fitness enthusiasts…thank you.

Goose out

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